Ground Hog

Original day

It was during fifth grade at the end of the school year. I did not have a hard time making a friend, in fact; I talked a lot to a couple of friends. There was only one friend that stood out from the rest because she talked to me and played with me more since the first day I moved to the school during my fourth grade year in Pierce City. It was during recess when I heard from someone that my best friend told others that I was a 'loser' and boring to be around and that whole time I was thinking why did she say that? I had a hard time believing what they were saying and it was my very first time hearing someone secretly talk bad about me. What really hurt about all of this was the fact that it came from my only best friend. I was really hurt to the point that I stopped talking to anyone starting from sixth grade and thereafter because I was too scared and at the same time I lost the ability to trust anyone anymore.

How I would change it

I would go back to fifth grade and do what I have always feared but felt that it was necessary and the best way to do, confront her. I want to know the reasons why she said those words and ask her if I could improve on it or could have change in some way so that she did not feel so uncomfortable being around me or how I acted. I would have been able to move on if I had heard her reasons and forgive her and change myself to be a better person. She would still be my friend although it would still be a while to trust her again but she was still my first and best friend and the one person that trusted me with her secrets. Not all friendship is perfect and the best thing about a friendship is being able to talk to that person again who knows all your faults and still stay as your friend.

How it would effected my life today

I would be able to talk normally to people and not have to worry about what I say and be able to trust people with simple things and ask for help when I needed it. I would not have a hard time expressing what I want and be timid on how I sound when I'm answering a question when the teacher picks on me. I would not finish most of my sentence halfway when I realize how boring it sounds to people. I would be able to extend my current vocabulary with other people instead of repeating the same things over and over again. Most importantly, I would be able to make real friends and have friends I could rely on when I feel like the pressure of my family and school is getting too stressful for me. I believe my life would have been a lot easier if I had friends in school and to talk to when things are hard.